Once upon a school run……a few weeks ago, I was taken aback by an outspoken, rude comment from somebody about my children. Firstly, this person, whilst peering into the pram, asked the sex of my new baby. I told her that Hattie was indeed a girl. She then asked whether I had other children. Two boys, I said lovingly, pointing over to them. Oh, said the stranger. You must be so glad to have a girl now – so much nicer in the future and boys are such a handful. I stood aghast! My boys were in earshot, for a start. How awful! I was speechless and hurried away, trying to ensure my children hadn’t comprehended what had just been said.
In hindsight, I should have retorted with something wise and quick-witted but my tired, muddled, baby brain just couldn’t think quickly enough. I wonder what their reaction would have been to ‘yeah, the stork didn’t listen when I wanted to send them back!!’ Instead, I had to process the exchange later on, at home. This isn’t the first time people have thought it appropriate to comment on the sex of my children. ‘Two boys…are you trying for a girl?’ ‘Two boys…that must be hard work?’ ‘Two boys…I’m so glad I have one of each!’
No actually, I want to scream at them! I love my boys. Yes, they are lively, silly and noisy but equally, they are gorgeous, funny, kind, loving, wonderful little beings. They are my children and I would not change them for the entire world. Yes, I now have a baby girl who I am equally besotted with, yet I would also have been delighted with another healthy boy. We had a third child because we wanted another child, simple! The fact that the boys have been blessed with a sister is amazing and we are so thankful but please don’t pass judgement about how we feel about that.
My sons are fantastic together and adore their baby sister. Of course they argue and even fight, at times. However, we are raising them to be kind and considerate humans and we are nurturing a family bond that will support them and their sister, as they develop and learn. Why then should my future relationship with them be any different to my future relationship with my daughter?
The joy I feel at having delivered three children is immense. That is all that should matter, not their sex, their looks, their size. Children are gifts – beautiful, precious gifts and I feel uplifted every day to see, feel and hold mine. As they grow I will only love them more fiercely, so next time I hear such an ignorant comment…..I’ll be ready! Mum power to you all – stay strong!
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