Summer holidays, behind the scenes!

In today's blog, I am going to attempt to present the reality behind the bliss (ahem) that is the long six weeks of summer. 

So, here goes. Six weeks is quite a mammoth challenge, even for the most patient and creative parents. Here's a few reasons why: 

1) The days will be spent with such good intention but you will find you've achieved little other than feeding and clothing your offspring. Sometimes, you will still find them in their pyjamas after lunch...which is fine, I might add! 

2) You will repeatedly say no to i-pad usage, until you are quite literally blue in the face. At the last moment, the draw of the digital nanny will engulf you and you will relent....whilst you slink off for 5 minutes peace. 

3) You will have refereed at least 5 minor arguments before your morning coffee break. One will involve the fact that one sibling has something the other wants and cannot live without. That plastic piece of party bag crap has never been so popular. 

4) You will spend time googling spa days secretly on your phone...imagining yourself in an oasis of calm and tranquility, not surrounded by screaming kids and Lego bricks. 

5) You will get out the house for an exciting day trip to find you've forgotten to bring snacks, raincoats, wellies....your sanity. It will be pissing it down with rain. You will feel and look like a shit mum or dad! 

6) You will run out of ideas on what to feed the brood. Thank God for school dinners! They will complain that they've had pasta 5 times already this week, when you bloody well know they've only had it four times!! Seriously, you'll prepare gorgeous, healthy, scrummy food and they will eye it with caution, suggesting it looks and tastes like soil, or shit even! 

7) You will plan in short bursts of educational activity, to ensure all is not forgotten when the little scamps return to school. What happens during these moments is you cajole them to sit down to learn their tables (for example), yet they suddenly need the toilet and then spend the next half hour giving you reasons why they don't need to do any school related work anyway. You will give up and put it off for another day! 

8) You will attempt to co-operate to play board games with the kids. What starts off as fun and smiles will soon turn into a tantrum of epic proportions, as one child wins and the other is missing 4 of the legs on his build a beetle! Fun will not be had in this instance! 

9) You will try to ensure the children have as much outdoor time as possible. Afterall, you want the little monkeys to sleep don't you?! Cue a garden littered with discarded tennis balls, bats, fishing rods and spades. Argh!! 

10) You will check your calendar regularly.  Your emotions will be very mixed - you love having them at home but school routine is equally tempting when they are hurling toys at each other during a full blown sibling disagreement. 

All in all and joking aside...school holidays are pretty special. Those stolen cuddles, laughs and smiles make every stressful moment melt away and if one day doesn't go to plan, there is always another waiting to unfold.